i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
