Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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