ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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