a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
