Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
