He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I can text with my tongue
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
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