explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
