You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Randomize
