He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize