Swine flu. Run for my life!
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
