Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
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