They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
