I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
