No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
