I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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