There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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