About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
