do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
