the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
