? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I touched a dick in church today
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
