Nicole vs. Life
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
