I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
