wanna go halves on a baby?
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
whose ass print is on the piano?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
