But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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