Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize