I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Randomize
