Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
