we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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