i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
where are you?
Hypothermia
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
