what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
