Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Welp...herpes.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
