I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
