If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize