help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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