Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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