Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
