white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
