I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
