i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
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