Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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