im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
