i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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