I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
