: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
