GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize