Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
