Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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