I want to stick my p in your. b.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize
