dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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