Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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